Everyone Needs Another Friend

Ariel Wong University of Auckland, New Zealand

Date

March 8, 2019
Currently studying at: University of Auckland, New Zealand
Homeschool: Arcadia University

I have officially been in New Zealand for about 2 weeks and a day. The time has absolutely flown by, and I really can’t believe I’m almost done with my first week of classes. My flight went well (obviously, I am here now) and Arcadia Orientation was an amazing action-packed 3 days. From zorbing to seeing my first kiwi bird in person, it was a great time, and I’ll be sure to do it due diligence with its own blog post later.

What I wanted to address in this post was a struggle I’ve been facing lately. With classes starting, I’ve been having trouble with transitioning to a larger university. With my home school having 2,400 undergraduates and 1,400 graduate students (don’t quote me on that, I’m sure the statistics have changed), I’m accustomed to walking to class and seeing at least 5 people I recognize. The University of Auckland almost feels like its own city unto itself. Nearly all of my classes are in these large lecture halls, and everyone seems to already have their own social groups that are pretty set. I feel this the most in my upper-level Biology courses. In 200 courses, most of the students in the class know some of their classmates from their first-year. Trying to find a seat in a lecture hall, where everyone seems to have another friend, can be such an isolating experience. It feels like the prime example for feeling alone in a room full of people. It’s a struggle I’m still coming to terms with and a challenge that I didn’t consider that I would have to face.

It’s no secret to anyone that knows me, but I’m one of those people who is endlessly involved in activities around campus. I’m an Orientation Leader, tour guide, tutor, and was the Secretary for Student Government. I attended the Activities Fair at the University, but it was way more overwhelming than I anticipated. With more than 100 clubs and hundreds of other students also roaming the booths, the entire experience was crowded, sweaty, and insane. This also threw a wrench in my plans, because clubs were going to be my main plan of action to meet new people. It felt like another sign of defeat in a string of recent difficulties.

I know I sound like I’m endlessly complaining about how terrible this experience is, but there have been some highlights. The group of students going to Auckland from Arcadia have really become my second family here. I feel extremely lucky that I am in this program with these amazing people, and they have made this transition so much easier. We even took a little road trip to Piha Beach the day before classes started, and hosted our own barbecue. We’ve also made the effort to see each other every day to see how we’re all doing.

That leads me to the main point of this blog post. Everyone needs another friend, and sometimes you have to be that friend for yourself. Be kind to yourself and don’t forget to do things that make you happy. I splurged a bit on a small watercolor set because painting is something that relaxes me. I’ve taken spontaneous walks around parks in the city to give myself time to think and just get outside. I’m trying to take advantage of some of Auckland’s gorgeous parks and I’m even typing this post while relaxing in a nice spot of grass. Indulge yourself and do what it takes to live your best life. I’m still worried about making friends in my lectures and outside of class, but a little self-love can help to ease that difficulty. If you feel like me and are struggling to start that conversation, sometimes taking some time to focus on yourself can make a world of difference.

Moving forward, I’m going to try to hold onto the phrase that “Everyone needs another friend”. For me, it reminds me that everyone is a little anxious about meeting new people, and getting to know others from different walks of life is an intrinsic part of the university experience. Hopefully, I can round up my courage and strike up a conversation with the person sitting next to me in my next lecture. Until next time!