Student Bloggers

I’ve been living in Rome for just over a week now and it’s so much harder than I ever thought it would be. In a new place with new customs, new cultural cues, and a new language, it's easy to feel like an outsider. I get hungry at the wrong time for dinner, mispronounce even the most basic words, and I haven’t quite figured how to cross the street like an Italian. (They say all roads lead to Rome, but does anyone have a map for drivers once they get here? Because I’ve almost been vehicular manslaughtered at least three times.) Even something as simple as going out to dinner or trying to find fingernail polish remover is an absolute ordeal. And for the first time in my life, I look like an outsider too—with my long blonde hair and light eyes and skin, my appearance practically screams “foreigner.” To be fair, it also doesn’t help that, at best, I speak in garbled Italian kindergarten vocabulary.

It's very easy to be frustrated here, mostly because everything is so aggressively different. For instance: dinner is served at 10:00 pm here, and that’s only if you’re a nerd. Real Romans eat at 11:00 pm at the earliest. And say you’d like a hot shower? Forget about it! Romans spit on hot water—they save all that heat for making out at public traffic stops.

There have been lots of times in this first week when I’ve had to remind myself that different is what I wanted. After all, what other place in the world could I be having the experiences I’ve already had in just a week’s time? I mean, I had gelato for dinner last night. And I visited the tomb of Saint Paul this morning—that’s the Saint Paul, by the way, as in: “Nice to meet you Jesus, my name is Paul!”

No matter where you choose to study abroad, there’s always a lot of talk about being a “Yes” person—saying yes to things, keeping your mind open, and taking advantage of every opportunity. But in a new place where you consistently feel at least a little bit silly, being a “Yes” person is a lot harder to put into practice. So instead of focusing on being a strictly “Yes” person, I’ve been trying to live my time in Rome as a “Grazie” person.

"Grazie" is the first Italian word I learned, and one of the only words I knew before arriving. It's a good word to know, mostly because Italians love it. For example, a few days ago I ate brunch in a small restaurant with a young waiter who got so excited when we all said “Grazie”—to the bringing of napkins, the delivery of menus, the exchanging of plates—that he instinctively started saying “prego” even before we had any reason to thank him. He would come back and forth filling up our waters and exchanging silverware, just muttering “pregopregoprego” and smiling any time he got close to us. Experiences like that are why, instead of just saying “Yes” to things, I’m also making it a priority to say “Grazie.”

In this past week when I’ve so often felt like an outsider in Italy, its been very easy to let my mind spiral into a darker place and lose sight of the incredible opportunity that studying abroad is. To keep my negativity in check, it’s helped me to be aggressively thankful for everything I’m getting to experience—to truly try to embrace the “Grazie” way of life. Instead of thinking about how much my feet hurt because I got lost on the way to the restaurant this afternoon, I’m remembering that walk as the time I found a Sephora. (One week in and I’ve already located my mothership! Grazie to that!) Instead of getting frustrated by my own lack of language skills, I’m thankful for anytime I get to meet an Italian who is willing to help me! And even though homesickness hits occasionally, I’m trying to say “grazie” more, even if it's just to thank myself for being brave enough to be positive.